If you love this book, you might not want to read ahead. A lot of unpopular opinions are about to spew from my lips…er fingers.
Publisher: Bloomsbury USA
Publication Date: August 7th, 2012
Series: Throne of Glass, #2
Genre: Fantasy, YA
It all starts with the cover. At first glance, you see it, and you’re blown away. It looks so bad-ass and awesome! But then you look closer, and you realize it’s actually ridiculous. How can anyone possibly fight with all that long hair flying everywhere?
And don’t even get me started on those pants. They look great…till you realize that if this was real life, her pants would be falling off her butt, they’re slung so low! I can’t even look at them.
Girl, your pants are falling off!
And this is where my eye rolling began.
Quick sypnosis: Celaena is the most notorious assassin in all the land. She’s spent the last year in a brutal prison, sentenced for life. When she is summoned to the king’s castle, she is given an offer she can’t refuse. Compete with 23 other soldiers, killers, and thieves for the chance to become the King’s Champion and win her freedom.
I didn’t like this book. I really did not like it at all.
My experience with the cover art was basically my experience with the book. I expected some gritty, hardcore, assassin action-packed novel. That’s not what I got.
Calaena isn’t an assassin. She’s a fluff ball!
This quote says it all:
“How had she gone from the most feared prisoner in Endovier to this sappy mess?”
Yeah, that’s what I’m wondering too.
Celaena doesn’t spend more than five minutes in the castle without bemoaning about her looks and wondering if the Prince and Captain of the Guard are attracted to her. Maybe this is just me, but I generally expect captive assassins to be planning and plotting, not weeping over her dirty fingernails.
My suspension of disbelief was completely shattered right away. I didn’t believe for two seconds that Celaena was this awesome assassin.
When she wasn’t flitting around in pretty dresses and thinking about the Crown Prince, the rest of the novel she usually spent cussing out people and throwing inanimate objects at them, which naturally the Prince and the Captain of the Guard were just smitten with. Okay, I’m sorry but if the guy I liked was chucking books at my head, I wouldn’t be into that.
Don’t get me wrong. I like saucy, strong, independent women, but temper tantrums in adults are not cute, or at least don’t stay cute for very long. Sorry. Sorry I’m not sorry.
Speaking of the Crown Prince, Dorian, I can’t stand him. He’s a womanizer who then bemoans about how all he wants in life is true love. Hey, here’s a thought, Dorian. Maybe if you spent less time objectifying and using women, maybe one of them would fall in love with you.
I’m probably being harder on this book than I should be. I hate it when I bash, but I just couldn’t stand most of the characters! But the real thing is that I just didn’t believe them.
This series still has another chance to impress me. It has potential. Maybe it will follow the Sarah J. Maas pattern of the first one being okay, and then the next book being awesome? It is her first book after all, so I will cut her some slack.
I’ll keep reading. I’ll read it for you, Chaol! Because you’re one of the few characters I liked. I have a feeling you’re endgame too, so we’ll see if Celaena toughens up and is worthy of you.